Its bloody hard
This picture on the left is me completely stripped bare, its raw, its sad, its embarrassing but its me. Now before I took this picture I had been having a bad day, it wasn't long after my breakup, DB had been crying and being very demanding all morning and I just crumbled, I sat on my floor and cried like one of the girls in the movies, head in my hands, knees up like a real drama queen. |About 10 mins later DB came in from playing in the front garden and said "you ok mummy" and kissed my cheek, and instantly it made it all better, I got up and started again for him that day and that is why children really are the best medicine.
I'm not afraid to show this picture, I cry...A LOT for flip sake, I really am an emotional mess at times but that my friends is life. I hear people say all the time that parenthood is easy, its fine, if you do it right its not hard and maybe for them that's the truth but for me? Its bloody hard, I'm not organised like I should be at times, sometimes MB is late for school, sometimes DB has odd socks on, sometimes the dishes are not done for a few days and even though I know all of this needs improvement I still find it hard to do. I find it hard getting up in the mornings and actually getting changed, I find it hard keeping the house clean, I'm defiantly not one of those people who could have anyone drop in unplanned, I need at least 30 mins notice!!
I think parents these days are afraid to admit when its hard, of course its hard, its a nightmare at times and you think to yourself why did I do this, why am I not lying on a beach somewhere getting strawberry daiquiris handed to me, and then you think about the good and they always always outweigh the bad, their laugh is the best laugh in the world, their love towards each other and me is beyond compare, their smiles light up even the darkest moments in life and their hugs make me feel like I can do anything.
It took a lot for me to post this picture because I don't like people seeing me much without makeup etc don't get me wrong I'm not a glamorous person but I like to at least look like I've showered that day!
So just remember if your struggling, finding it hard or just down right pissed off at life your not alone and your allowed to feel that way. It will and does get better, just remember to breath.
Thanks for reading guys
MDBD x
